Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The DIE HARD COUCH POTATO

Swiss holidays, the Sunset in the Bahamas, Bungee jumping, ........ absolutely nothing is even remotely close to a day spent in front of your television set, with your rear sunk a good 5inches into your snug sofa cushions, your fingers very tenderly roving through the remote buttons, an occasional sip of bournvita (1.5 spoons of bournvita powder + 2 heaped spoons of sugar + milk) , a packet of potato chips and your leg stretched out to the other end of the couch. Yes, i am the die hard couch potato and i am proud of it..

Thursday, June 4, 2009

SAREE SHOPPING..."WHo me? No way"

Whenever there is a alliance fixed for anyone in the family (especially in my rather capacious family), the only thing that titillates the women is the experience of saree shopping, making sure it is expensive and is not the same shade as any of their other million sarees, and of course the idea of flaunting it. So the other day I had to accompany my cousin sister, mother and aunt to the saree store. Don't ask me how they managed to make me go with them, lets just say these women are 'expert persuaders'.
So here we are outside Pothys, the massive clothes store, in Panagal Park. At the entrance was this guy/lady dressed in a massive Teddy bear costume. I waved at him/her but the moron didn't respond, can't blame him/her because i guess he/she would have fallen asleep or would have passed away inside that costume, considering the fact that he/she has been doing the waving even when the temperatures touched 44 degrees.
The stairway at the entrance has eight to ten steps which took us two full minutes to transcend because of the number of people we had to tackle, push, and shoulder. That is how congested it was. We wriggled our way to the Silk Saree section where the ladies found a spot near one counter and started their selection while I found my spot next to a pedestal fan. The place is so congested that I am sure the store spends a fortune on room fresheners because the air conditioners have no effect.
One irksome aspect about women at these stores is that they derive some sort of a sadistic pleasure by asking these poor shopkeepers to stack up, spread, and have a private display of every single saree available knowing fully well they won't be buying them.
Anyway after the billing and all was finally over a sense of relief and triumph that "I SURVIVED" crossed in as we left the store, but it was shot down when my cousin said, "So next stop, Man Mandir." FYI-Man Mandir is a saree store in Nungambakkam. I turned to her in total disgust and asked her , "WHY WHY WHY ME?.. I thought you just bought a saree each?", for which my mother goes, "what we bought now was for the 'main' wedding, what we are going to buy there is for the reception." I was thrown off, i mean i pity my dear uncles, father, and all other earning male members who have to succumb to the ever inflating wish list of their women counterparts.
The Man Mandir experience wasn't too bad. The interiors are tastefully done, the AC works well, you don't have to push, pull stamp feet, waggle yourself in, and they have these extremely comfortable cushioned chairs. A very interesting aspect, or should i say USP of Man Mandir is that their people who help you select the sarees also work as part time models. Meaning , if one wants to pick one saree from a variety of say 5 sarees, these sales people stand up on the counter(which is a good 1.5 feet in width) and actually wear the sarees on top of their shirts and pose as models. So i guess the selection criteria for a job as sales guy in Man Mandir would be - 5ft nothing (anything taller, you would hit your head on the ceiling while standing on the counter), butler English, ability to drape a sari in 2min and fold the longest sari in 30secs, moustache compulsory (or else your identity will be mistaken when you are doing the modelling part) . So that was some day, there was a sense of triumph for the ladies. They consider Sopping to be the greatest stress buster, but i won't get into that, I was just happy to get back home.